Farewell Letter to G, for now.....

I ventured to the supermarket the other day to see you and your family standing there, you looked amazing. I spent the last year and half scared to death that you were not safe, protected and loved. I also spent that time missing you tremendously, that great smile and your unmistakable call for “Daddy” will always resonate in my head. I didn’t want to say anything cause I didn’t want to confuse you or create anymore turmoil in your life, you have gone through so much already, so I just walked on by, wowed that I finally got a chance to see you again. I hope you didn’t see me I wouldn’t want you to think I forgot about you, far from it. I’d rather you live your life and be happy. But I was glad I got to see you healthy, and well kept. It gave me some clarity of your future and even know I
will still worry daily, at least I know you are likely on a good path.

I want to thank you for being a part of our lives and creating so much love in our home. You brought a lot of joy to our family and I hope the time you spent with us brought that same amount of joy. You helped me through some trying times, and helped me grow as person and most of all as a parent. More than you will even know. I hope the skills and goals we instilled in you while you stayed with us, bring you much joy and happiness. I hope to, someday in the distance, see you again. See how you have developed into a successful young lady. And watch you walk with confidence, strength, and beauty into your future. I wish you everything the world has to offer and hope you receive it. I will always miss you, and of course I love you very much. Best of luck my little girl.

Love

“Daddy”

Time 'tick' 'tick'

TIME SCAPE

Time is an interesting element in our lives as human beings. It can be used as a punishment (prison), used as a pleasure (vacation), used as a measure (work week), or even used as a threat (you have 6 months to live). Whatever it is used for, it will never stop, and never reset. Its unforgiving in that way. There is no pause, rewind, and fast forward. There is just time with no concluded end

When young time seems endless; open to new possibilities and hopes. The sun seems to never set and new horizons seem to grow almost in an instant. There is no value put on time at this age because it seems so endless. When age starts to show its ugly head, time seems to go by faster leaving you wanting more but not able to accomplish it within the quicksand’s of the hourglass. No matter how hard you try things begin to slip out of your grasp, you fall behind, your list become smaller because the longer lists from before are no longer attainable. The older we get the even more quick time seems to pass by. Instead of hours missed it becomes days, weeks, months and even years. We forget and the pass erases all existence of the events. Maybe this is why legacy is so important to most people. Why having a clean image is more important than being honest and true, no matter how horrible the truth. Why are our lives set up with such a parameter. Is it so we value time and thus live, if so than why do we as humans not see the value of time till in most cases it’s passed us by. Is this the cruel reality of time’s plan to make us aware late in life of our wastefulness of it.

I’d like to think that time somehow continues after death. But being realistic there is probably a slim chance of this. I like to think I’m going to be more then fertilizer in my absence but until that day comes I will never know, and of course I’m not too much a gambler with common ideas that are supported by no evidence. So in retrospect I will wait to explore that avenue and see what it brings. For now I chase time, trying to catch as much of it as possible and harvest as much of it as I can. Spend as much of it with family and friends, and as little of it with doubt and depression. It’s way too short to waste on simple thing like that and I’m way to busy looking at the better things in life.

Think Pozitive ….. 5

WAR DESIGN

WAR DESIGN  2009

Warhol’s film “Blow Job” spoke of a principle of early Soviet film theory, the “Kuleshov effect,” in which shots taken on different meaning depending on their juxtaposition with other images. Does this concept along with extra images form an alternative meaning? Does the use of the term “The End” or the image of an abstract tank form a military or war like design?

 

Though this piece would be apropo to what is going on in the Soviet Union right now.....cheers.....

ACCOLADE, 2010

ACCOLADE  2010

Enamel Paint, Aerosol Paint, & Ink on  Stone

As seen on  Oxygen’s Bad Girls Club, Season  5, 2010

Curves and formations, the softness of the skin, even on hard and challenging surfaces , the finer lines of the human body show depth. On stone, which is porous, elements  absorb into the source, almost bleeding into it . But even with all these curves and all this beauty, it still remains flat, texture less, and shallow, with evidence of vanity.....

STATS, 2009

STATS, 2009

AEROSOL PAINT, LATEX PAINT, & COLORED WOOD STAIN ON RECLAIMED CABINET PANEL

(On viewing at  Miami Beach Community Health)

 

109,472 is the number of HIV+ people in west palm beach, Broward and Dade counties alone. Or at least the closest number I could find searching the internet for two hours. Why are these kinds of facts so hard to find, especial when we have three cities out of ten in the top 10 cities for HIV infection in the nation. You would think that these numbers would be important in bringing awareness for both the infected and uninfected…..Think Positive…..

BROKEN - DEMONS

 

BROKEN - DEMONS

Everyone has demons. Some are vague and only show their heads at times of extreme weaken and some are extremely powerful and control a large percentage of a person’s life. Some people have one or maybe two demons and other may have many that they have to deal with. I think the older we get the more we recognize these elements in our lives as toxic and we begin to extinguish them one at a time, But again some are very powerful and take a much longer time to eliminate. Sometimes we eliminate demons by trading one demon for another, maybe a less harmful demon. We sometimes see ourselves in a continuous struggle with our lives because of these demons. This struggle can affect our self-esteem, our attitude, our view of the world and sometimes our entire mental state. Suffering develops character if it is allowed to be objectively looked upon. When people suffer they either learn from the experience or they claim victim to the experience, either way they eventually will build some character from the experience, may it be good or bad. At what point during this suffering do we as human being to either cross over and progress as people or give up and fall victim to one’s self. Why is it that some humans can have enormous amounts of suffering, yet progress as if nothing detrimental had ever happened, and other experience a small amount of suffering and it encapsulates their entire life. Is it just weak genes or a weak mind or is it something deeper inside us. Is it the teachings of our parents to take suffering in stride and keep moving on, instead of giving up or is it instilled in our souls from something else. Where ever it comes from we need it as a motivator, a guild to keep us focused and directed. It comes in many forms, from a laughing baby, to a document on a wall. Some may seem strange or odd to other but they are the driving energy that power them. Broken is a state of mind a point where you have given up and stopped. It’s weaken, disease, quicksand. This suffering is how we learn, but only if we allow ourselves to gain that knowledge from it. Unfortunately this struggle can only be concord by one’s self. There is no support group, or program, or lifestyle that will help us unless we first find peace and resolution within ourselves first. So the solution is there is no solution; it changes from person to person with an infinite number of recipes based on a specific individual’s situation.....



Scream Series

 

 

SCREAM 1,  2009

SCREAM 2,  2009

I  pose a question, to better understand why human beings must suffer to advance.  Why is a scream sometimes for happiness or triumph? Why is a scream sometimes for pain and suffering? Do these two emotions have a connection or is this just  random.  We all come to a time where suffer plays a dramatic part in who we become and which direction we may travel…..

Take a look at these two painting and tell me if the woman is upset for the lost of a child, or if that child just won a huge race. Tell me if the man just got shot in the leg or if he just won the lottery.

2014 Mission

OK I'll start off with some New years Mission for 2014.
1. Spent more time with the wife and kids. We all get so caught up in day to day crap family some times falls behind and before we know it its gone. I plan on spent very second I can, you never know when you are up, better make the best of the now. Plus they deserve it they put up with me. That in it self is a task.
2. Fix my credit and financial status. I never understood how poor credit can effect very aspect of your life till this past year. No more of that crap, time to tighten up. Consolidation of some loans, reduction of some bills, Sallie Mae, need I say more. Any advise out there?
3. Improve my Health. Stop standing around thinking I'm superman and start doing something about it, you know eat right, and workout a bit. The health issues of this past year helped with this brain storm too. You can only run so far before life catches you.
4. Spent more time with friend. We are not getting younger and over the years friendship have drifted due to work, family etc. Friend are very important they provide support, communication, and most of all stress relief.
5. Design and Art schdule for the year of 2014: I can't wait to start some new work for 2014. I just moved into a space where I have a studio space and I'm itching. I look forward to creating some public murals this year so if anyone might have a space open give me a ring. Also looking to continue my personal mural project, so if anyone might be interested???? On a home side I can't wait to start the redesign of our new home, room by room, and of course the customization of my JEEP.
These are the main few. Not in any specific order but all important and needed for my insanity .

ARTISTIC UNDERSTANDING

I have to say something about this. So I posted a painting on a Artist website that I giving away for the holiday. I had someone contact me on messager say it was sexually explicit and asked me to take it down. Hears the kicker he's an artist and photographer, and producer. I would think an artist would have a more open mind about sexual based art work, but I guess I was wrong. Just to clarify the series in question is called 213AOE series, and its based on the exploitation of women and men based on our make-up as humans. It based on the Art of exaggeration, where human beings exaggerate parts of their body for all kinds of psychological reasons (acceptance, success, culture, etc. etc. etc.) I reposted on Facebook not because I'm saying F you to the other artist I want to see what other artist feedback is on the subject.

.....5......

The other two pieces currently in this collection are 213A

And 213 B

The Art of Exaggeration AOE.....5.....

BLUE FLAG PROJECT

SEPT. 11, 2001: I REMEMBER WORKING FOR THE MEDICAL EXAMINERS OFFICE. WE WERE PICKING SOMEONE UP FROM THE ER @ JACKSON MEMORIAL HOSPITAL IN MIAMI, ONE OF THE BUSIEST AND LOUDEST ER IN THE TRI-COUNTY AREA. AS WE WALKED IN AN UNSETTLING SILENCE FELL OVER THE ROOM, EVERY ONES FACES (PATIENTS, NURSES, & DOCTORS WAS FIXED ON THE TV SCREEN. IT LITERALLY FELT LIKE THE APOCALYPSE

OF COURSE AMERICA WENT ON THE DEFENSIVE AND INVADED AFGHANISTAN LOOKING FOR THE SAME PEOPLE THEY SUPPORT SEVERAL YEARS EARLIER BY SUPPLYING THEM WITH WEAPONS. BUT NONE THE LESS, I SUPPORTED THE TROOPS 110%, THOSE GUYS WERE FIGHTING A WAR AMERICA STARTED, AND AS A RESULT SO MANY MEN AND WOMEN HAVE DIED IN BATTLE OR BY SUICIDE, FOR WHAT A PATCH OF OIL NEW "US SOIL".  WAS IN FULL SWING. THAN OF COURSE SEVERAL MINUTES LATER THE SECOND PLANE HIT AND AMERICA KNOW THIS WAS NO ACCIDENT THIS WAS SOME KIND OF ATTACK.

WHEN THIS STARTED I DETERMINED I WANTED TO DO SOMETHING FOR THE TROOPS TO SHOW SUPPORT AND THIS IS WHERE THE BLUE FLAG PROJECT BEGAN. I STENCIL A BLUE FLAG EVERYWHERE I WHEN. IT SYMBOLIZED SUPPORT AND HONOR FOR OUR TROOPER BUT NOT FOR THE BLOOD SHED OF OUR GOVERNMENT.

AFTER 13 YEARS THE FLAG STILL STANDS IN FRONT OF THE US ARMORY. FADED AND IN NEED OF REPAIR BUT NEVER COVERED OR CROSSED OVER.

IN 2012 MY GRANDFATHER PASSED. IT HIT ME MUCH HARDER THAN I THOUGHT IT MIGHT AND I BEGAN TO REALIZE THE MORTALITY OF US ALL. HE LEFT MY GRANDMOTHER WITH SUPPORT FINANCIAL AND WITH SEVERAL HOMES TO LIVE IN. HE LEFT HIS CHILDREN AND GRANDCHILDREN WITH A SENSE OF WELL BEING AND RESPECT FOR A MAN THAT SELDOM SPOKEN, BUT WHEN HE DID IT MADE YOU SMILE. I MODEL MYSELF OFF HIS TEACHINGS AND HOPE I CAN BE SO INFLUENTIAL TO MY KIDS. HE WAS ALSO A MILITARY MAN AND I WANTED TO DO SOMETHING FOR MY GRANDMOTHER TO SHOW THE RESPECT I HAVE FOR HIM. I DECIDED TO INCORPORATE THE BLUE FLAG PROJECT INTO THIS WORK, DUE TO THE FACT THAT EVERYONE THAT GIVES UP THEIR LIVES FOR A CAUSE OR A COUNTY DESERVES HONOR. I ALSO INCORPORATED SEVERAL OTHERS THAT HAVE BEEN INFLUENTIAL IN MY LIFE AND THE LIFE OF OTHER AMERICANS. MILEY A GREAT FRIEND CURRENTLY SERVING IN THE NAVY, LANA A NEW FRIEND CURRENTLY SERVING IN THE COAST GUARD, HECTOR HERNANDEZ, MY FATHER-IN-LAW, SERVED IN THE AIR FORCE, AND OF COURSE PAPA JOE SERVED IN ARMY AS A DOCTOR.

UNFORTUNATELY I WAS DENIED THE MURAL PROJECT AT THE ARMORY. PER THE SERGEANT THEY ARE PLANNING ON REMOVING THE BARRICADES AND ADDING A FENCE, WHICH WOULD DEFEAT THE PURPOSE OF DOING A MURAL ANY HOW. MAYBE A VIDEO TIME LAPSE AND A SECOND MURAL WHO KNOWS.....5.....